When a child is ready to be reunified with his or her birth parents, adopted, or placed in a permanent home other than a foster home, it is your responsibility to assist the child and your family for the upcoming transition.

The child may feel betrayed or want to know why he or she can’t be adopted and become a permanent part of your family. This is an important question and should be answered with as much honesty and clarity as you can provide. This will help to eliminate any uncertainties (including feelings of responsibility) that the child may have about why they are moving and provide them with your ‘permission’ to move on to another family. The child will be looking to you for positive and encouraging words about where he or she will be permanently living. Any feelings of hesitation you have about the child moving on are quite normal, but should never be a barrier to their permanent placement.

There are several things you can do to support the child’s permanent placement, including:

• Accept and embrace that it is in the best interest of the child to move to this permanent home
• Gather as much information from your case manager as possible about the child’s permanent family
• Provide the child’s Life Book to his or her permanent family
• Provide information to the child’s permanent family detailing his or her daily routines and habits, favorite foods and toys, academic performance, and what you have observed as his or her strengths and needs
• Allow the child to see positive interactions between you and their permanent family, whenever possible
• Make yourself available to the child’s permanent family, if or when asked
• Share with your case manager any feelings of concern you have about the child’s permanent family or your upcoming separation from the child
• Thoughtfully prepare and pack the child’s belongings, sending along favorite books, toys, and other personal items he or she will need
• Plan a celebration (formal or informal) in recognition of the child’s departure from your family circle and acceptance of his or her permanent family, inviting people with whom the child has come to know and care about

Be ready to joyfully let your foster child go and to make room in your heart and home for other children who will need your care and nurturing. The time, energy, and love that you have given a child who has spent time in your home has made a lifelong, lasting impact. You have provided a child with a safe and nurturing family environment when he or she was most in need. During this time, he or she has grown emotionally and socially in meaningful ways that will last a lifetime.

Page 56